I’ve been thinking about today for a while, not really sure I’ve wanted it to come. One year ago today we arrived back in Minnesota after 13 months in Kenya. There are just so many feelings around thinking about it. So many questions. And yes, there are tears.
When I’ve thought about today approaching, it’s made me sad. Sad we didn’t get to spend the last year in Kenya. Sad we had to leave half way through our first term. Sad we were just starting to really get to know our neighbors and get in the groove of life at Tenwek. Sad we didn’t get to do another round of holidays after spending the first round observing how each was done. Sad we didn’t get to have another year of Fridays with Pete’s medical team squished around our giant table built by a friend.
I spent my life dreaming of getting to be a wife and mom and missionary teacher, and after I finally got a taste of it, we had to leave. Ten years of dreaming with Pete about what life would look like on the other side of the world, how we would raise our kids and learn a new language and go on wild adventures because they were right outside our door.
I know we’ll get back to Kenya. We’ll go through the things we put in storage there and open bins like it’s Christmas. We’ll hug our friends and practice using words in a language we never hear in Northern Minnesota. But it does hurt that we don’t know when that time will come. Sam’s speech is exploding and he’s getting so much of what he needs that we couldn’t give him in Africa. God is doing big things in Sam and in our entire family right now as we wait to go back to our other home. The waiting is hard.
There have been so many times in this life when I’ve had to open my hands and hold my dreams before Jesus, not knowing what would happen. This is one of those times. But we’re using this time to grow and do what God has for us in this far too familiar time of waiting. We trust that what He has is good and best. I think we’ll look back at the end of this road and see what He was doing. But even if we don’t, we’re going to trust Him. The Creator of dreams, the Lord of all.
Even in my sadness and with all my questions I will thank Him and I will praise Him.
Thanks Ang, I too was sad for you, but being with Sammy the other week showed me that God has you where you need to be. We don’t always get the answer to Why?, but we always get the hug of His love. You are an inspiration to me! Love DAD
Dad, you’re the best. I love you.
Waiting is so hard! And its hard to talk about the things we wait for. But God is good, and its okay if our stories are not fast (something I have to remind myself frequently).
It’s so good to remember that. God’s writing the story, and He is good. Thank you, Katie. 💛
Waiting is truly a hard season and one a lot of people don’t share/talk about. Thanking you for sharing and inspiring others while they wait. I am in a time of waiting in the foster care journey and it is so hard. This post is a beautiful reminder to choose joy every day and to trust & wait in God’s goodness. He is a good good Father!