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Simplicity: Six Months & a New Perspective

Today marks the end of our six months of intentional, financial simplicity. We began on January 12, jumping in to a commitment of six months of very little spending, meaning we were basically not going to spend any money outside of what was really necessary for our family. That included selling Pete’s Jeep and becoming a one car family. I was pretty nervous about this journey before we began. I just didn’t know what to expect. We were opening our hands and asking God to show us what changes we needed to make as a family. I knew I had some habits that needed changing, some material stuff that had sort of wrapped itself around my heart. As a family, we wanted to make space for God to speak to us about how we were spending our money and whether or not it was bringing him glory. Reflecting back on these last six months, I am realizing my heart has truly been changed in some really good ways.

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Leading up to January 12, Pete and I spent a good amount of time combing through our budget to see what we could cut out or seriously cut back. We canceled a few subscriptions, evaluated our food budget, and greatly reduced the amount we allowed for clothing, coffee, gifts, and other line items that were not necessities. We spent the first three or four months of this six-month journey very strictly sticking to the guidelines we set. At that time, after we felt we had broken the spending habits we knew weren’t healthy or what God wanted for us, we started to explore the areas we did feel were okay for spending. That doesn’t mean we started freely spending in those areas, but we did allow for some leeway. After watching for six months, I can pretty happily say that these are actually areas that line up with what we’ve listed for years as values for our family: relationship with each other and with friends, education, health and fitness, and adventure.

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1. Relationship with each other. I’ve mentioned a bunch of times that Pete and I have a weekly date night. We adore our dates and look forward to them all week. Before starting our six months of financial simplicity, we decided that we would definitely keep our babysitter budget so we could still go out regularly. We did, however, cut the spending for our nights out. That’s one thing that changed about three months in. We started seeing movies on $5 movie nights and going for inexpensive dinners. We know that our marriage is so much stronger because of the time we devote to each other one-on-one each week, and it’s so, so great to find fun things to do together. Pete has done the same thing with Ella on their weekly dates. They find lots of free things to do together but they’ve also started rock climbing at an indoor wall nearby and having other sweet adventures.

2. Relationship with friends. So many people mean a whole lot to us. We’ve realized even more since January that it’s super important to us to be able to love on our friends and family by giving them our time and by sharing meaningful gifts with them.

3. Education. We love books. Love love love. I am a reading teacher, after all. Way back in December, I felt like God was going to be opening a time for me to enjoy them more then I have in the past, which was actually the same time I discovered audio books. I listen to books while cleaning, folding clothes, driving, doing stuff on the computer. I get most of them online through the library, but I have found my newer reads on Audible. Pete also likes buying books, especially medical texts. And now Ella is diving into reading, though most of her books come from the library. I’ve also begun attending online classes and webinars as a way to keep up my learning after the kids are in bed. Some classes are free, but most cost a little something.

4. Health & fitness. We realized pretty early on that our food budget was so small we weren’t able to buy all the fresh food we feel is best for our family. It won’t be the case in Kenya, but for now, we have to pay more for the healthy stuff. So we ended up expanding our food budget about a month in. As for fitness, we want to be okay with attending a class or buying a workout program if it’s something we’re really going to use. Good health will allow us to keep going for a long time, so it’s worth the room in the budget.

5. Adventure. We would be so bored without adventure! It’s such a part of who we are as a family. This also kind of goes with our relationships with each other, since we usually have our adventures as a family. This is what gets our hearts pumping and minds racing. Definitely an place we feel okay spending money.

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Like I said, I’m pretty happy with those categories that came to the surface as being important for our family’s spending. But what about all the other places I was spending money before starting this journey? Honestly, most of them have almost completely melted away. I was making a list a couple days ago of things I want to buy tomorrow, and I honestly could only think of a few items. I would like a set of wine glasses and a couple new shirts for Sam. We are also in great need of new bar stools as ours are falling a part. (Seriously, if you visit, I will warn you before you sit down. Pieces are for real falling off.) There really isn’t much more than that. I just don’t feel the need to buy little things for my home or extra things for the kids. My heart has changed. I would much rather spend our money on the categories I listed above and not fill space around me. Experiences fill me with such happiness, far beyond what I could feel from a new shirt or a cute little ice cream bowl. (Though I certainly still like looking at these things! Just a few days ago, I oohed over an adorable set of cone-shaped ceramic bowls that would make ice cream treats such fun! But did I feel a need to have my own set? Not at all. Just noticing their cuteness was enough. That’s a good change for me.)

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These six months weren’t all about depriving ourselves of material things or experiences, which is really what I thought it would be. I was sure I was going to miss shopping and that I’d probably really struggle through the months. But I didn’t! Instead, I discovered God was showing us who we are as a family and how our finances and habits fit into that picture. This morning at church I was not at all surprised to learn the message was on finances. How fitting! It allowed me to think through the changes my heart has made and to ask if they really do line up with what the Bible says. I was reminded of a few verses I’ve heard a hundred times. “Do not store up treasures on earth! Moths and rust can destroy them, and thieves can break in and steal them. Instead, store up your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy them, and thieves cannot break in and steal them. Your heart will always be where your treasure is.” (Matthew 6:19-21, italics mine) I love that last verse, and I truly want my heart to be focused right where God wants it. In order to keep it focused right there, I know I need to continue this journey.

So, where do we go from here? We plan to basically stick to the habits that have been created in the last six months. We’ll keep our overall spending to a minimum, and we’ll always talk to each other about purchases before making them. By doing so, we’ll able to continue our momentum toward paying off Pete’s medical school loans by Christmas!! We are confident that we would not be anywhere close to having them paid without our changes in the last six months. In many ways, we’re incredible thankful that God made it so clear to us last December that we should take this plunge. The freedom we’re feeling is pretty wonderful!

Thank you for being a part of this journey with us!

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We Love Our Daddy!

Happy Father’s Day to all the daddies! I am fully aware that not all daddies are biological or legal daddies, but when they pour their hearts out to the little ones in their lives, they are very much a real father. I’ve seen so many amazing examples of this, so happy father’s day to you, too!

Pete worked over night in the ER after working in the medical tent during the marathon yesterday, so for father’s day, he’s being gifted a ginormous nap. He deserves it! When he wakes, we’ll head outside for a picnic or a bike ride or some other fun in-the-sun activity. This morning, Ella and I put together a short video of all our favorite pictures of Daddy and her Papas to tell them how much we love them. Because we really do!

Happy Father’s Day!!


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Must Be Summer!

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running errands in mama’s heels

Summer! We’re loving it! Ella has been out of school for three weeks and we are on full summer mode. The only thing missing is summer heat, though I’m okay taking that part in moderation. It usually takes a while for Duluth to warm up, so in the next couple weeks we’ll probably start seeing it climb to the 80s. I know, I know. All of you anywhere south of us are probably thinking 80 sounds cool. But that’s life on Lake Superior! We usually get two hot weeks, but those don’t come around until August. Until then, we shall soak in our ‘pseudo-summer.’

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dancing after dinner with daddy

 

The biggest adjustment since Ella graduated from kindergarten has been getting used to the schedule. She does best when she has something structured outside the house each day, so I registered her for something each week in the mornings. Last week was theatre camp and this week is nature camp. I had this grand idea that I would drop her off each morning at nine, run errands with Sam, he would nap a bit while I wrote or cleaned up the house, and then we would eat and leave to get Ella. Lovely, right? Well, somehow in my planning I forgot that Sam has therapies three mornings a week and I lead a moms’ Bible study on Tuesday mornings. That leaves one morning a week when we aren’t going from drop off to therapy to errands to pick up. Four weeks following nature camp will be tennis, which is only 45 minutes in the morning, so we might have a little more down time, but then we still have therapies and, still, we have just one car. I tried to plan well but clearly left a few details out of the calculations. Oops! At least we’re having fun!

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a sleepy boy at Trader Joe’s

 

With all the running in the mornings, my afternoons have been filled with errands and Kenya prep and meetings while the kids are at home with our dear Ms Donna. I would be struggling with this schedule if we didn’t have her with the kids four afternoons a week. I really need the time to get the big tasks done. Unfortunately, that leaves me with very little, if any, time to write. I’m so relieved to have a quick hour today to squeeze in some writing time. I’ve realized that my writing is how I focus my thoughts and my heart, whether it’s blogging here or journaling or writing long, hand-written notes to friends. When I don’t get any alone time to write, I start to feel jumbled and anxious. I’m taking a deep breath right now, sipping an iced chai, and getting my thoughts in order. I have really, really needed this.

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pictures with Sara

 

Next week is Ella and Sam’s birthday party! I wrote not too long ago about their upcoming pirate and mermaid party. I’ve been working on projects here and there to have it put together in time. It turned out that we have to have it on a Tuesday afternoon. I was a little worried about scheduling it for that time, but parents seem to be happy to have something to do with the kids on a summer afternoon. The grandparents even get to join us! And we did make that pinata I mentioned. Ella was interested at first, but once she realized that paper mache is pretty messy, she no longer wanted to participate. Not at all what I was expecting. So I did a good part of it. We have to put on the finishing touches, and then I’ll post a photo. As for the rest of the party, I’m working to primarily use materials I already have, but there were a few little things I decided to purchase. I know we’re not buying extra stuff right now, but they are having a combined party, which saves a lot of money, and sweet Sam hardly had a party last year. We just met a few friends at a playground and had cookies and juice boxes. Am I making excuses for spending? Yes. Yes, I am. I love hosting parties! I spent some money, and that’s just the way of it. The party is going to be adorable!

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making of the pinata

 

My hour at the coffee shop is nearly over, so I must wrap up. Pete needs the car in 15 minutes. I hope you are all enjoying your summer! I’d love to hear what your favorite part has been so far or what the weather is like where you are. It must be warmer than Duluth, right? 😉

 


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Birthday Parties & Presents

It’s been a good while since I’ve written about our simplification journey, and I’ve got a quick 30 minutes before getting Ella and Sam ready for the day, so why not dive in right now? Let’s see if I can get my head through a couple ideas before Ella comes knocking at the door.

Remember in January when we started our six months of simplification? We’re still going strong! We’re a little more than four and a half months in and it has been so, so good for me. Really, I feel I’m the one who needed the most change through this time, which is why I’m sure God had to speak it directly to me and not to Pete first. As much as I would like to say I would have jumped right in if Pete would have brought up the idea, the honest truth is that I would have needed a whole lot more convincing. See? God knows me. The guidelines we set up at the beginning, the ones we felt God was helping us write, have been changing my heart and my mind. Like I’ve said in previous posts during this journey, though…it’s still hard. Here are a couple of the tough places for me right now.

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1. Planning the kids’ birthday party.

I knew going into these six months that Ella and Sam would both have birthdays and that we would need to host a couple of birthday parties. I adore planning parties. Part of my theatrical self comes out when I can create a welcoming, festive party space, and the hostess in me me loves putting together a menu and games that fit the theme. And the mama in me is so happy to watch the kids play with their friends, celebrating another exciting year. Sam just had his birthday and Ella’s is in one month, so party planning is back on the agenda. Only this time, I’m trying to keep the cost down as much as possible. My darling Ella came up with the perfect idea just after Christmas. She decided she wants to have what she calls a ‘twin’ birthday party, meaning she and Sam will have a combined party. Perfect! Only one party to plan and they can celebrate together! Her theme choice? Pirates and mermaids. Again, perfect since we live on the lake. So I’m now planning the snack menu and decorations. Thank goodness Pinterest has so many free options! Ella and I will get to spend some of her free time once school ends next week to make homemade decorations, which I’m pretty sure will include a pinata. She has requested it multiple times and, well, I loved making paper mache globes and what not in elementary school. Time to pull out those flour and water skills again! The hardest part of our party planning so far? Finding a date that works. Is it odd to have a mid-week late-afternoon birthday party? Because I’m pretty sure if we want this party to happen in the next two months, that’s exactly when we’ll have to do it. That’s allowed in summer, right?!

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2. Gifts for friends.

I’ve realized how much I love to buy gifts for friends. Never have I enjoyed buying presents out of obligation, like “Shoot! I have to get something for Becky because she’s having another birthday!” (Though it’s never actually a surprise, since it does seem to happen at the same time every year.) When I’m out and I see something that would perfectly fit a friend’s personality or current place in life, I want to buy it for them. Maybe it’s my love language for my friends. I know the feeling of getting a gift just because, and I want friends to feel that joy, too. Instead of buying things at the store, though, I’ve been trying to use everything in my box of gifts. I’ve been collecting little things for a couple years, keeping them in a plastic container in my closet. Now I actually get to give them to friends. But it’s still really hard to keep myself from buying perfect little presents when I see them at the store!  Confession: I did recently see something I knew my mom would like, and it was her birthday, so I bought it. She is always drinking water and reuses plastic water bottles over and over, so when I saw a cute pink bottle at the grocery store, I put it in my basket. I knew I was going ‘against the rules,’ but she’s my mom, you guys. I have so much – so much – love and respect for my mom, so when I saw that $10 bottle on the shelf, I went with it. Because, seriously, you guys, she’s my mom and she deserves it.

So yeah, those are two tough places at the moment. Trust me, there are more, but there are a whole lot of really good things, too. I’ll share those soon. In the meantime, have a great weekend!

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Video: A Year of Sam on His Birthday!

Happy 3rd birthday to our amazing Samuel! We can’t even express how much we adore you, sweet boy!

 

 


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Here We Are!

Our computer is on the mend! Can I tell you how happy this makes me? I was praying her issues could be fixed instead of requiring us to purchase something new right now. We’re trying to avoid extra purchases, of course, but a computer is hard to be without. We managed for about a month on the iPad, but it is far more time consuming for me to do anything with photos in a blog post on it. We were finally able to get the laptop to the Apple Store on Sunday and this morning it was back at my door. And we weren’t charged a thing. Talk about service! So now I kinda want to stay up all night catching up on photos and all things computer. I probably won’t, since I’m trying to get better about my sleep schedule, but maybe. Hmmm.

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he loves scooting around on the zebra

 

I feel like we’re in need of an update! Biggest news? Sam is going to be THREE on Sunday! I’m working on wrapping my head around this before the day actually arrives. I’m hoping to maybe do a little photo shoot with him in the next couple days and to spend some time dreaming through the last few years. I love celebrating birthdays with the littles. It’s such a magical time for them. I don’t want to dread each time they roll around, getting sad over the fact they are growing older. God is doing beautiful things through them and that needs to be celebrated!

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this kid is obsessed with popsicles!

 

Ella has just a few more weeks of kindergarten. The year has flown! We’ve all been learning how to work through the ins and outs of independence. She has made some very sweet friendships this year. We’ve been thankful for her opportunity to be at the Montessori school, where she’s had the same teachers the last three years. They know her very well and have guided her through some wonderful educational and social lessons. Next year, she’ll be at the same school where there will be about 15 kids total in first through sixth grade. I still think this has been the very best way to prepare her to be homeschooled with we get to Kenya.

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Miss Ella’s before & after – a little pixie cut for summer

 

As for the summer, Ella will be having all kinds of adventures! I’ve registered her for morning activities through June and July and a little bit of August. She’ll be doing theatre camp, tennis lessons, VBS, and day camp at a nearby nature center. She’ll be busy, but not overwhelmed, since I only signed her up for one activity at a time. It might get a little tricky with just the one car, but we’ll make it work!

Pete will continue working hard this summer. He is doing an incredible job of paying off his medical school loan! This was one big hope we had with limiting our spending for these six months. We should be finished paying the loan off sometime this winter. Though he is working a lot, he is very intentional about spending good time with us each week. We are devoted to our weekly date night. He takes Ella out each week, too. When he’s home in the evenings, wrestling with the kids is inevitable, and he often naps with Sam in the afternoons. We love him and everything he is doing to get us to Kenya!

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date night

 

Speaking of Kenya, how about an update? We recently sent out our first mailing to kick off our fundraising. Next, we’ll be meeting in person with people who have expressed interested in partnering with us in East Africa. We are also dreaming of a few event possibilities to share our hearts in the fall. As for training, this fall we will be taking an online course focusing on missions in the Bible and then a week of sessions at the mission headquarters in Indiana. Sometime next summer we will attend a month of intercultural training in Colorado Springs, and then we hope to be off for Kenya at the end of the summer of 2016. Lots of work before then! We love it, though. We’ve been dreaming of this for years and years, so there is so much joy in all the preparation. Will you please be praying for us as we continue to move forward with everything? And if you would like to receive one of our letters, please click here to send us an email with your mailing address and we’ll get it right to you. We would love for you to be a part of our team! Real lives are going to be touched through the medical training Pete will be guiding and through the education I hope to provide once we get there. I get so excited talking about it!

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small group mamas helping with our first mailing

 

Oh! And me! I am working on gearing up for summer and all the fun stuff Sam, Ella, and I will get to do together. I’m getting ideas from Pinterest and talking to friends about play dates. I want to be outside as much as possible. I’m even painting a little table I found a while ago at Saver’s so we can take it out in the grass with us. It will be perfect for sketching in our journals, having tea parties, and eating lunch by the water. I’m also getting ready to start a new book with the moms’ small group I lead at our place on Tuesday mornings. We just finished The Best Yes (so highly recommend it!) and will be starting The Fringe Hours on June 2 (also so, so good). If you’re a mama in the Duluth area, you are more than welcome to join us. Send me an email for more information. The group does have child care! I also started P90X3 last week and am working hard at sticking with it this time. I haven’t had a good track record with that since Sam was born. I love the workouts, I love eating well, it’s just putting it all together every day and making it a part of my regular life again. I will do this! (And yes, I will take any prayers for perseverance you want to send my way.)

And that’s that! All updated! Be sure to check in on Sunday for sweet Samuel’s third birthday!

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my Mother’s Day kiss!

 

Disclaimer: I was not compensated any way for the content of this post. All opinions are my own.


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